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Hi, I've been with my husband since I was 15. I'm now 31 and we have separated. This isn't the first time. The years have
been nothing really than a battle. I fell pregnant at 19. I stopped partying, drinking, drugs and moved with him hours
away from my family. He didn't stop until my son was about 5. I left him for a year during that time as he started getting
violent and really hooked on pot, speed and ecstasy. I came back on his promise it would end, it did he got super fit to
the extreme he would get really mad if he didn't have a meal on time. Now he wants more and is using steroids. Last year
he left me and had over a dozen women in 3 months including prostitutes. He came back again, but I found out later about
this. I couldn't get passed it and kept condemning him for it. Just recently I found out he's been on dating sites. He
wants out and I know it's for the best. But I just don't want to live without him. I don't know how to . I know I'm a
beautiful woman with lots of love to give. Why and how can I love this man? How can I stop checking up on him and let go
of whatever it is that's tieing me to him. If a miracle happened and he sorted himself out is there hope of restoration or
am I nuts and need help????

Rainbow81 , age: 31 / 09.11.2012

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