In order to get back the lost love one should overcome his selfishness
One can say that family life is all about trying to keep and get back your love. Due to pride and selfishness we are always at risk of losing this gift that God had sent us. The trusting marital relations as well as relations between parents and children are the greatest gifts God had given us and we should learn to cultivate and keep them up.
It can happen that due to some reasons our dear one might become contentious, offended or deprived of something. In such condition this family member behaves aggressively and blames others. Feeling ‘a loser’ or ‘a victim of someone’s evil will’, he or she strives for self-assertion and as a result hurts and wounds other family members. Evil thoughts and feelings grip his or her consciousness so inflexible that sometimes it seems there is no way to stop that person.
If this is a case, to get back your love under these circumstances is not easy. And yet, it is possible if you manage to overcome your own selfishness and indignation, if you turn to God and pray to Him just as Jesus prayed for His offenders, ‘Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.’ Praying from the heart can help in resolving even the most severe conflicts and disagreements. It can help to recover peace and calm as well as to attain sympathetic understanding for the other person. According to the Holy Fathers, Christian love, the kind that ‘bears all things, believes all things, hopes for all things, endures all things… [that] never fails,’ can really subdue hostile attitudes and restore the peace that got broken because of haughty thoughts. What essential in relationships with our loved ones is to learn how to rise above our passions, petty grudges and complaints in order to restore, with God’s help, the family’s well-being gifted to us by the Lord.
Psychologist Irene Moshkova
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